[physik] Insomnia makes you lifeless, Dont wait for it to turn into depression!

[Monty Aguilar]

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how have you been surprised what can i say
and i cheat like alot well usually i ease up on weekends but i feel so crappy and bloated again that i cant wait to start eating right on monday but i have kind of had to tell myself this is just the new lifestyle and if i want to indulge every now and again im going to cause id rather die than not be able to have some chips and guac or a slice of cake every now and again so if i eat like this 90% of the time then ive noticed that my body or the scale doesnt mind if i wander in my choices a bit the other 10% exercising everyday helps with this too i feel like its a great trade off- feeling great and a regular period for a little self control
i was born in orange county where my parents had lived in the same house for like 20 years they had both lived in so cal all their lives 

seriously though my closest friends are fun real and honest good entertaining in love with life a little crazy down to earth deep and incapable of bs
a few months in the life of this infertile girl

even more obsessed with flickr than usual of late
one thing i enjoy about facebook is the old pictures that friends and fam upload to walk down memory lane together with you 

im loving babies & mamas sunshine happy rooms and cool colors get
with that heres the stuff i eat salad with chicken a different salad with chicken repeat repeat this is the hard thing about it not a ton of delicious options im kind of kidding ive found a few other yummy things too

do you have to be obsessed with yarn and needles and hooks like i am to think that is the most inviting little space youve ever seen 
cate (incredulously) what were you a child of adam and eve

and that made me think of all the insomniatic nights that she stayed up with me and mirrored my every move and snuggled me right out of my anxiety into dreamland long after grant and cate had drifted off
guess what i finally put in the shop

the girl loves chocolate milk
i look for girls with purses that compliment mine

just a phone call one night she had an aneurysm and although this was a surprise of the worst kind it was the most spiritual time of my life much good and understanding has come through that loss
grant and i talked last fall about wanting to take control and own a home and make some of our dreams a reality so we planned to move back to california for some opportunities there 

and then suddenly and to my surprise i met and married the man i had no idea i was dreaming of but he was perfect for me and better than anything i had imagined or sought after before
the girl loves a project i mean LOVES it was like so fun to her to print them off plan how she wanted to present them go to the store for candy sign and put them together she just bossed me around and made sure i tied the string right 

isnt life surprising i was laying awake thinking last night about how different my life has gone then what i thought (in a good way)  is this  ELLE
say hi to gilbert and the kids with love km

cause that would make me happy
this week i am getting all my ducks in a row so that this weekend i can hole up and sew myself some desperately needed skirts for church and summer 

acre of land is my favorite song of his 
breakfast i always have two eggs and salsa always i dont really get sick of it and it would really stink if i did because theres not a lot out there for breakfast actually when you are at your ideal weight and ovulating regularly you can have any kind of whole grain hot cereal without a problem you know steel cut oats etc i am not quite there yet berries and grapes are pretty low on the glycemic index and i have those too oh and i love cottage cheese with fruit

but let me tell you thats not how it will really go i imagine most kids will want to stay home and play computer games but their moms will make them come and so theyll grudgingly put on a some church pants and skirts so i was wondering if you could help me know how to bring the romance back into our modern life its not really that important no matter the dress or the menu we just want the kids to come to feel the spirit of the temple but its like you said anne when you dont use your imagination to make life beautiful how much you miss
what a few hours on a sunny day can do for you


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